Dancing Photoshoot Oprah Is Exactly What You Need

Hi, how is your soul right now?! Weirdies? Middlin’? Meh-tastic? Watch this super brief video of Oprah dancing at a photo shoot for the February cover of O, The Oprah Magazine and be revived.

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First of all, you need to take a moment and give thanks for the fact that Oprah has, for 15 years, had her own magazine and for every single issue of those 15 years she has appeared on the cover. Honestly, some future historian is going to write a dissertation about the greatest things that happened in our age and its just going to be 30,000 words about that.

I deeply and sincerely hope that the O staff goes through the process of having an editorial team meeting about the cover model every single month. I hope there’s calendar invites, I hope there’s a Slack channel devoted to it, I hope there’s a PowerPoint involved, I hope there’s a lot of drama around reserving a conference room. Every month someone says, “Well, we’ve got a few options for the cover. We’re thinking about Viola Davis, Tammy Duckworth, Jameela Jamil, Jennifer Lopez, or Oprah.” And then they debate for, like, six hours. Like, they have to order dinner from Eataly or something because it’s taking so long. Someone’s texts their assistant, “See if you can swap my Once On This Island tickets to another night; it’s gonna be another nail-biter.” And then, finally, they decide “It’s Oprah. It’s gonna be Oprah.” They all stumble out of the conference room, exhausted but satisfied, their faces stained with tears and Eataly tiramisu. They clap each other on the back. “Can’t believe it, but she’s gonna make the cover again. What can’t she do?”

That’s exactly how I hope it goes down. EVERY. SINGLE. MONTH.

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What can’t she do? If you thought she couldn’t singlehandedly lift your spirit twice in one week, boy were you wrong! No tiramisu for tirami-you. This clip is a miracle. Oprah is doing what is, undoubtedly, one of the most awkward things a person can endure and making it absolutely magic. The results of dancing, prancing, and flouncing for a photographer can be wonderful but the process of actually doing it are mortifying on the level of that “Touch your foreheads together” engagement photo pose or getting put on the Kiss Cam with a sibling. I have no doubt that Oprah could make even those experiences charming and delightful, too.

In an iridescent gold dress, her hair flowing free, she hops around barefoot and joyfully and honestly, I want to elect this video for president. “But what is this video’s foreign policy experience?” the naysayers naysay? Gleeful dancing is a foreign policy experience, obviously. Hasn’t anyone seen Billy Elliot?

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I’m going to need my gym to start running Oprah’s Dance Your Way to Good Mental Health classes immediately if not sooner. The ideal class line-up is as follows:

  • Oprah’s Dance Your Way to Good Mental Health
  • Beyoncercise
  • Magic Mike Stuff
  • Brunch
  • Crunches or Something, I Guess
  • More Oprah!

    Every wedding you go to this summer is going to require this choreography. The Electric Slide is out; the Oprah is in. She has the range!

    Stop what you’re doing, throw on your best gold lamĂ© gown, like a guest at a Studio 54 wedding, set your desk fan to “BeyoncĂ©” and dance it out. No matter what’s going on, as Shonda would say, dance it out.

    Follow R. Eric Thomas on Twitter.

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